It's Been a While

It's been a while. After talking to a friend last night he unwittingly made me realize that I needed to get back to  blogging. I have been writing long hand in a notebook tho so I could use that as fodder later on.

To catch up. I am starting school on the 23rd. My major will be creative writing. I would love to do freelance work for magazines and such. I also really like proofreading too. I may look into that too. But at least I am going back to better myself.

Usually I like to write about what I am thinking or things that have happened to me. Right now I am heartbroken over several broken relationships.  I want things to get better but how? Do I need to take the first step to cross the bridge? Do I leave it alone? How can I convey that I want to move past that thing that came between us?

Because of my personality I wonder if they even miss me? Do they realize that it's been two years since they have talked to me? Do realize that I have visited in that long? That we haven't shopped together? Haven't had a cup of coffee? Haven't laughed? Do they realize the damage that it has done to others around us? Do they care at all?

I talked to Mr. Spouse about it and he asked me why I was worried about it now. All I could think of was I miss my friend. Did I do something that was unforgivable? Have they been waiting all this time for me to step up? If I explained my feelings would they listen? Would they understand?

So the question of the night is. Do I take the first step? Leave it alone? I know that God has it under control. He hold the future in my His hand.

Lord I come to you know and ask, to plea that you show me the direction you want me to go. I ask that you soften people hearts and prepare them for what You have planned. Prepare my heart for what you have planned, Lord help us to put away our childish ways and move beyond the hurt so that our renewed relationship will shine your light. Amen